Some Sox fans have started Soxtease, full of shirts proclaiming the wearer’s desire to, um, be friendly with the Sox team. “Foulke me, Keith”. “I’d do porn with Mark Bellhorn”. That sort of thing. In that spirit, I’ve come up with my own original slogans:
“I’m waiting for a ManRam”
“I’d like to dally with Doug Mirabelli”
“My legs turn to jelly when I see Mirabelli”
“I’m willing for Schilling”
“I’d blow for Lowe” (the “let’s skip the entendres and get right to the point” option)
“I’d give the works to Ellis Burks”
“I’d shave for Damon”
And I can’t believe there’s an “Oh Oh Theo” shirt. Lusting after the GM? What’s next? “I’ll give a bonah to Terry Francona?” “I’m waiting for Francona’s slow hook”? “I’d get in the sack for Papa Jack”? “Oh, Henry!”
And finally, for Youkilis:
“I’m KY’s jelly”.